When I was younger, out of exasperation, I blurted the question ‘why are there not more hours in a day!’ to my kid brother (then 8)  His reply: because you’ll die right away? I laughed so hard at his quick response and then realized that yeah, it must be 24 hours for a reason!

After that I decided NOT to focus on the time on the clock but rather began to question if I was doing what I really should be doing. Of course, many years later (and I do believe much wiser!) I realize that “better time management” was what I was aiming for back then.

So without further ado, my tips for you so you can manage your time better.

LIST down what you want to accomplish.

Ever wonder why you seem to be doing A LOT and yet seem to be accomplishing nothing? This is probably because you are doing tasks that when ‘grouped’ do not sum up to finishing off ONE bigger task.

Sometimes, I have this in the mornings. When I synchronize my email, 12 different things need to be done. Doing the first task leads me to think of another important task and before I know it, my To Do list is longer but I can’t cross off any project! I have since then made it my routine that I do certain tasks and finish them off BEFORE I even open my Inbox.

I also do this: get pen and paper and go over yesterday’s list and then I make a NEW list for today. This way, I start my day focused on what I need and want to accomplish.

Prioritize. What MUST be done today vs. what can be put off for tomorrow?

Now that you have your To Do list, which ones MUST be done today and which ones can be left off for another time? Remember to not only look at the length of time a particular task takes but to group tasks so that you accomplish a whole project.

Learn to say NO.

During the day, other people may come up to you and ask for favors or try to pass on their tasks to you. Learn to say NO. Of course, don’t be rude but do stress the fact that you have your own lists of responsibilities and that if they want, they can wait till you can fit the favor/task to your schedule.

Cross-out every task that’s been finished and pat yourself on the back.

Sometimes, the list of unfinished tasks can be so overwhelming that we forget to congratulate ourselves for what we have done during the day. This is another reason why it’s good to make lists in the morning. At the end of the day, when I look at all the stuff I finished and crossed out on the list, I feel darn good no matter how many other things are left open.

You can only work so many hours in a day.

Sure there are 24 hours in a day but I try my darn best to keep my working hours to 8 even though I work from home. This is because ‘personal time’ is just as important as all the other stuff.

Think about it; if you take an hour for exercise, and hour for relaxation, and so on, wouldn’t your mind and body be better able to do the tasks that lie ahead?

I used to even feel guilty for spending 10 minutes a day on meditation because of my deadlines. Well now I take 15-30 minutes a day to meditate. I find that I think better and work faster after such a mental break. Try it!

This is however different from being ’socially empowered’, where people naturally gravitate to your aura and energy. In this situation, your self-confidence is the one that attracts all the others (as opposed to gaining self-confidence via the response of others to you).

So, why would you want to be socially empowered anyway?

Most socially-empowered people are successful; because they conduct themselves extremely well in social situations, other people look at them as their natural ‘best friend’… which they would likely to help at all times.

For example, if you’re social skills are good, then people see you as a HAPPY, ENERGETIC and above all, a CAPABLE person. They will more likely to help and assist you in your endeavors.

Of course, make no mistake, others will ask for your help too but nothing in this world is ever gained by just ‘taking’. It’s always a give and take situation and people are morely liekly to share, give to you, and help you on your way to success if you are socially adept.

So how do you develop great social skills?

The first thing you need to work at is yourself. Are you too shy? If so, then you need to start hanging out with other people more. This is the only way you can start training yourself be comfortable with others in social situations and for your personality to blossom.

You don’t need to take up public speaking! Start slow. Initiate and invite a friend or two for coffee. Work it up to a casual lunch of dinner and move on from there.

If, on the other hand, you’re a bit well, grouchy, then you need to work on that temper and demeanor too. Let’s face it, no one likes to be next to someone with a permanent frown on his/her face or someone who’s always focusing on the negative aspects of everything.

To start changing this, here’s something that doesn’t cost much: start to SMILE more! If you find yourself thinking of something negative about something or someone, stop that thought immediately. Instead, think of what’s GOOD about it or that person and focus on that.

I’ll provide more tips to be ’socially empowered’ in my next post!

Image source: ImpactFactory.com

I hope you enjoy this video as much as I did.

You’re not alone. We all experience situations where we can hardly keep a lid on our negative emotions. But you know what? You know that tantrum won’t help. Furthermore, giving in to negative emotions and retaliating in anger or despair will lead you to say or do things you will most likely regret later on. So what do you do?

The number one thing to do is to train yourself to be a POSITIVE person. When you achieve this, you will realize that turning your back at negative thoughts will be easier. Following are ways you can develop this.

Prioritize and take care of yourself.

A healthy mind and body does wonders for one’s way of thinking. When you’re healthy, you’re always upbeat and less prone to succumbing to negative thoughts.

Focus on the things you’re grateful for in life.

Every morning, sit down even for just a few minutes and meditate on what’s good about your life. This will put you in the right positive frame of mind at the start of the day and makes you focus on the grand and beautiful things, rather than on the trivial, negative stuff.

Help others.

Helping others is really a way to help yourself. We all feel good when we help others so go out and be a help to someone. Do volunteer work in a group or simply focus on one person in your neighborhood that you can help and visit every few days.

Take a look at ‘negative thought triggers’ you may have and address these.

If you take a step back and evaluate what makes you mad or sad, do you see any triggers? When I asked this question to someone I know, she realized that she gets easily annoyed at work when a certain ‘friend’ joins the discussion and dominates it. However, instead of brushing the experience off, she seemed to be ‘collecting’ all these moments till it reached a point where anything related to the other person would set her off.

Realizing this, she has made it a point to avoid the other person completely. You might think that this is something you should address with the other person but let me ask you this? Is the energy spent worth it?

My message is this: don’t complicate things for yourself. If someone is not really important in your life, not somebody you can rely on or see yourself being a friend of… then why spend the energy if you feel it’s not going anywhere.

Cut the ties and live and spend time on people and things that actually matter in your life.

For instance, if you’re unhappy, you might emotionally eat and thus be unhealthy. The case may also be that you’ve let yourself go so much that you are now unhappy with the way your health has gone.  See, what I mean?

All this points to the benefits of leading a healthy and well-balanced lifestyle. I’ve covered dieting and exercising a couple of times in the past and will probably do so again if I come across something I know will benefit you, but for now, I’ll just focus on a few things that will help you snack in healthier way.

Drink water.

We’ve already discussed the benefits of increasing your water intake but this time drinking water also helps you get rid of any ‘cravings’. Further, even if you do give in, you will most likely not snack to much as the water has helped make you feel full.

Brush your teeth.

Brushing your teeth is so routinely done just before bedtime that it’s a mental signal to your brain that you’re done eating for the day!

Wait a bit…

Consider calling someone just to talk. Don’t talk about the craving but just catch up with family and friends. This will put any craving or hunger pangs at bay. After a few minutes of talking, you may find that you’re not in the mood to eat anymore.

If you must have something ‘bad’, make it at least a good choice.

One of the worst things you can do is to completely deny yourself certain food items. So if you must have something to snack one, try to eat healthier alternatives to a bag of chips. You can try freshly popped popcorn, a warm cup of vegetable soup, a handful of nuts, yogurt ice cream, veggie sticks with a humus dip, and more!

Stock your ref and pantry with these healthier alternatives so that even if you do crave a bag of chips, you can’t have them!

You may be asking yourself, why bother? Actually, you why not. There’s no ‘cap’ on when you should stop investing in yourself. Furthermore, being a bit more creative can have far-reaching positive effects in other aspects of your life.

You see, creativity is a lot about letting your mind run away with ideas. If you don’t develop creativity, you’ll find that many of the solutions you come up with in everyday life tend to be a bit on the bland side.

On the other hand, if you are creative and maybe even ‘wild’ about certain things, then your life will be full of spice and doesn’t want that, right?

If you’re still not convinced that you can be more creative than you are today, consider the following tips.

Free Your Mind and the Rest Will Follow…

The first thing to do is to get rid of any mental road blocks you may have. Don’t think about the fact that you’re not creative now. Instead think of how much more creative you will be in the coming days or weeks.

Simply put, stop focusing on shortcomings; think about what you will achieve in the end. Focus on the result and think of it as FACT. Don’t doubt it; just accept it. You don’t doubt that something will fall if it rolls off the table right? You accept it as fact.

So accept the fact that you will be more creative if you put a bit of effort into it.

The next thing to do is to really let your mind go and run wild when it comes to creativity. For this, you may want to focus on a project like re-decorating a small room in your home (or even just your closet will do!).

If before, you would have restricted yourself to a certain style or a certain color scheme, throw those ideas out the door. What do you REALLY want? And then just go for it!

Time for a Change of Scenery

Whether you realize it or not, a lot of your decisions come from habit. And so sometimes a simple change in environment is all you need to get your creative juices flowing. Let’s go back to your simple closet, garage or attic project.

Don’t brood in that space or think about it at work. Go out and let yourself be inspired. Go to a paint shop, attend a car booty, visit a friend’s house or simply go out to a park nearby for inspiration.

Note Down EVERYTHING that Comes to Mind

We often think about an idea and discard it in seconds. This time, try to note down anything and everything that comes to mind. After a few days, revisit the list. All of a sudden, some of those ideas don’t see so ‘wild’ after all!

Go and give being creative a good shot. You’re life will truly be more colorful if you do.

Photo credit: http://www.menofalls.com/joomnew/

When I say communicate, I really mean two things: your ability to relate what YOU want, and your ability to listen to what others want. Following are just a few tips to help you communicate better.

Think before you speak.

Oftentimes, we find ourselves blurting out just whatever it is that comes into our heads. Now, others will say that this is pure honesty. Actually, it isn’t. It’s simply lashing out and most of the time people who don’t think before they speak regret what they said, and worse, they realize later that they never got to express what they REALLY wanted to say.

So take a few seconds before you say something out loud. This may be hard at the start but if you make it a habit, it will become easier and easier each day.

Focus on the topic.

In a conflict situation, we often bring in previous faults, old scenarios, and so on, that really have absolutely nothing to do with the current topic.

Now, why does one do this? This is often a sign that the person thinks he is ‘losing ground’ in the discussion. Simply put: since he/she is not winning, that person is now grasping at straws and throwing them into the fire to make a bigger flame.

If you want to communicate better, then you have to remember to discuss just what is relevant to the topic; no more or less.

Be aware of the tone of your voice.

When you short or get angry, you kill the conversation. When you’re angry, you get frustrated and your emotion gets in the way. The person you are talking to also gets angry, also gets frustrated, and before you know it a shouting match ensues and you no longer want to talk to each other.

So if you want to be really heard, then it’s important that you keep a level voice. The discussion will last longer that way.

However, it’s important to find some peace in the middle of the madness we often find ourselves in. If we don’t find this piece of inner calmness, we’ll go nuts with all the things we have to do! So here are a few tips I have for you so you can find that inner peace.

Get organized.

Surprising how our plates get so full without us realizing it, huh? The first step to getting rid of daily madness is to get organized. So grab pen and paper now and make a list of what you need to do, and what you CAN do in the next hours of your day.

Normally, I just dump about say 10, 20 or even 30 things I need to do and start prioritizing them. If I get to do tasks 1-8 on the list that day, I’m a happy camper!

Learn to say NO.

Stop trying to please everyone! Ask yourself these questions: will these people be there for you if you need them? Can’t they really do these things themselves instead of running to you all the time? What will YOU gain from helping out this person?

It’s your life and your time, so you better start prioritizing things that will make YOU happy.

Yes, you deserve at least 10 minutes of your own time each day.

Most people feel ‘guilty’ for taking time for themselves? WHY? Your first priority should be yourself. This is the only way you can really be of any help to others. So go ahead and take that mini-break, be it a weekend away without any mobile phone or just a 10-minute meditation break in your attic, and simply take a moment to recharge.

You need to find peace inside you so can be happier and healthier overall. And really, there is no better reason or motivation for you  to do this than this: you deserve it.

Accepting and loving yourself is very important because if you don’t, how can you expect others to do the same? Also, not being able to love yourself will show in  every aspect of your life and this is  NOT the attitude of someone of wants to succeed in life.

So, do you want a life of happiness and success or one of loneliness and letdowns?

The great news is that anyone at any time can start learning to love an accept oneself. Following are a few tips to help you get on this road.

Know your good qualities and appreciate them.

What are you good at? What qualities do you possess that are just darn great?

And do not say you don’t know or that you’re not good anything. That is exactly the defeatist attitude that you should learn to overcome! So write down a few things that you like about yourself. In fact, even if you think others don’t like a specific quality about you but YOU like it in you, write it down!

Embrace your good qualities, this is the first step to loving yourself.

It’s good to invest in yourself.

True, nothing beats inner beauty… but a little outward help will not do any harm as well. In fact, oftentimes, uplifting one’s looks uplifts one’s spirit. So go out and have a new haircut, buy new clothes, and maybe even invest in improving the appearance of your teeth.

Now before you think I’ve lost my mind, please note that research shows that having misaligned, crooked, deformed, dark or unhealthy teeth is one of the main reasons for a person’s low self-esteem. So go to your dentist or buy a teeth whitening tray if this will help you improve your teeth and thus enable you to smile more!

Realize that no one is perfect.

People who don’t love themselves often compare themselves to other people and why others are so much better than they are. Well, realize this: no one is perfect. Everybody has a flaw, a bad hair day, days when they’re covered in acne, days when they messed up at work, and so on. We are all only human after all. So remove this notion that the next person is better and think this: YOU are better.

Freely accept the love of others for you!

When we do not accept ourselves, it’s hard to realize why others do. This time don’t ask WHY somebody likes you or even loves you, simply accept it. Accept that you deserve this love that others are giving you. And indeed why not? You are a great person with great qualities that have so much going for you… if only you love yourself enough to let them happen.

Apart from the obvious benefits to you, helping out with household chores actually have a lot of benefits for kids too.

Kids will learn about the value of responsibility. Teach your child the value of taking responsibility early. This way, he/she will not grow up with this inate desire to ‘pass the bucket’.

Prevents boredom and overall laziness. A lot of parents look at their children and wonder why they are just so lazy. Well, guess what? One of the main reasons for this is because they were never taught to ‘work’. Everything is done for them and everything is handed on a silver platter. On the other hand, if you teach your child the value of accomplishing ‘tasks’, then he/she will grow up thinking that ‘taking action’ is the only way to achieve something.

Keeps them grounded. We all complain about how the world has become too individualistic and materialistic. If you involve your child with household chores at an early age, your kid will learn the value of keeping his feet on the ground.

Bonding time! Doing household chores together is excellent bonding time. Use it to not just be together physically but as a time for real communication with your child. If you start this early, there’s a good chance your child will not lock himself into a room and not share anything with you during those dreaded teenage years.

Ok, so now you know the BENEFITS of motivating your child to help out at home but HOW do you accomplish this exactly?

First of all, ASK, don’t shout. Issuing commands by yelling or issuing ultimatums (if you don’t do this… you won’t…) is not the way to motivate your child to help you.

Secondly, let your child choose the chore he/she wants to do. If your kid absolutely hates throwing the trash out, then it’s ok if he doesn’t want to do it… but there should be a chore to replace it. This way, youf kid feels a bit in control as opposed to just being bossed around. Your child won’t resent the task and you still managed to make him/her help you one way or the other.

Lastly, don’t do the chore for him/her. What can I say? Kids will be kids and sometimes they’ll try to maneuver out of a chore. If your child ‘forgets’ to do something, don’t do it for him. For instance, he forgot to fold the laundry, leave it for him to fold the following day.